In another article in the Power of Mind series I told the story of falling off my bike as an analogy on a small level of how we have to 1) pick ourselves up and keep going, 2) be determined to build our dreams, and 3) maintain faith that our efforts will reach the positive outcome we envision. Willpower, determination/endurance and faith are indeed main ingredients in dream building. So though, are the stories we tell ourselves and others, and those stories are the topic of this article.
What I said in the other article was completely true. The story I did not tell, that was equally true, was that I was on that bike going up that hill as a way of trying to change to a positive mental state from a negative one. I imagine we all have buttons or circumstances that when they get pushed or come up, cause our psychological self to completely derail us. I will feel like I am a little girl again and completely powerless when someone hurts my feelings. It can be an ongoing battle within me to remind myself that “I am a strong, secure, adult woman and that in the course of things I have suffered much worse. I will not allow this upset to have power over me.” Sometimes that is easier said than done.
On the day I fell off of the bike someone had hurt my feelings and not told the truth about a situation but instead played it out in a politically correct manner. In fact a whole group of people have done so. I knew I was being lied to but I did not know what the circumstances were. I felt ganged up on, ostracized, and miserable. The thing that annoyed me was that I couldn’t get it out of my head. I would go a half an hour or 45 minutes and then it would be back again. I would feel bad and that would stop my forward progress.
Instead of telling myself the story that is far more true, the reality that all the dreams I am building are coming together faster than I could even imagine them a year ago, I was telling myself the story of the hurt little girl. Have you ever done this to yourself? Can you relate to the pain of it?
If you can, then let’s swap ideas about what you can do to change your mental state. That day I went bike riding. I was also listening to two of my favorite feel-good options: Kelly Howell’s Secret Mind Meditation and Jerry and Esther Hicks Processes. When I am listening to something that is being read to me, I cannot also be running a negative mental tape. An hour later, while not completely over it, I was at least back on track and ready to have a good day.
Perhaps you have tricks to help you achieve a positive mental attitude and feeling tone. Jerry and Esther recommend petting the cat. My dog Peter thinks that I should toss his stuffed Dragon around so that he can go chase it. My plants outside the door remind me that watering and fertilizing them always brings a smile to my face. Whatever your favorite solution, please share it with me by commenting on this article. We all may need a new trick in our toolbox as we continue on this journey to create the lives we want.